In the News

Cape Hazard Chronicle

‘Watchmen’ Make Waves At Beach Protest

A group of students from Farber University assembled at Menudo Beach to protest the over fishing of the Cape Hazard Bay sardine population. Although the group did not expect a sizeable turnout, they were soon joined by the Waters Watchmen, a local group dedicated to opposing all manmade threats to the marine local marine environment. “It was so exciting,” gushed senior Amanda Ginsburg. “Here is this group that we so admire, people actually doing something positive in the environmental community, and they came looking for us!” A spokesman for the Waters Watchmen group has said that they were notified of the students’ protest and were excited to branch out to non–affiliated activists. “The Waters Watchmen have always been supportive of concerned citizens,” the spokesman said. “Anything we can do to help the cause, we will–regardless of whether it goes through our group or not.” After the Watchmen showed up, the number of protesters jumped from 13 to over 50, and soon came the local media. “There were a couple newspaper columnists and a local television station here. It’s just so great how much more we accomplished thanks to the Watchmen’s help,” Ginsburg said. The students hope that the attention caused by the Watchmen’s presence will bring more public attention to a very important ecological cause. According to Ginsburg, “We have accomplished more than we ever dreamed of today, and it really was the Watchmen who made this all possible. The community could take a lot from their example of selfless dedication.”

Cape Hazard Chronicle

Local Environmentalist Hooked On Change

A controversial performance art exhibit featuring a woman dangling by oversized fishing hooks has opened much to the shock–and disgust–of local residents, but Monica DeLaurentis, the mind behind the concept, says that it is all a necessary part of getting much–needed public attention to an ecologically vital issue. “The over fishing of the local sardine population has been a recurring problem in the Cape Hazard environmental community. Time and time again, we have called for public outrage against the fishing companies, and yet it still has not been seriously dealt with.” Katie O’Hara, the woman who offered herself up as part of the exhibit, explains her motivation behind her involvement: “My body can take the pain. I can rise above pain when the suffering of the environment is so much more acute.” Miss O’Hara will pierce the skin of her back in 7 different places, and will dangle from the 5–inch hooks for 6 hours. The Waters Watchmen, the marine environmental group behind Ms. De Laurentis’s exhibit, have released a press statement hailing the exhibit as “shocking, controversial, and absolutely necessary in our public fight against over fishing.” Only time will tell if this venture into performance art will have the effect that the Watchmen intend.